"The" Dress

THIS IS MY GOAL.

This photo was taken in August 2010. I purchased this dress to wear at my 30th birthday. 

I weighed approximately 136 here. I still felt incredibly fat. But I was going through a bit of a mid life crisis at the time.... I won't get into it.

Anyway. This is my goal. This is what I want to look like again. My actual goal is to be 130 by Spring. I don't see that being a problem. My absolute goal? To be 125 by June 2013. That means I have 6 months to lose 17 lbs. I can do that. I have faith in me. I've stuck by this healthier living style since October and I don't see me giving up. Not when I've already lost 17 lbs since then. 

I tried on this dress pre-diet and my hips simply laughed at me. This dress couldn't be worn as anything except a legwarmer. 

I tried on this dress this morning, after my shower, and it almost fit. I was able to zip it most of the way up the back. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing that makes me feel. 

Growing up as a fat kid I just kept piling on the pounds. After several failed weight loss attempts (Phen-phen, SlimFast, Weight Watchers, SlimQuick, etc) and an eventual bariatric surgery I became convinced that there was no "easy" way for me to lose weight. That I just couldn't do it on my own. I honestly wish that I had known it would be as easy as counting calories and moving more. Now I know that this journey is mine to take alone. With a little determination and perhaps some slight obsessiveness I can get back to a healthy me.

Will I ever look as youthful in this picture? Hell no. I was just turning 30. I was having the time of my life. Friends, parties, no-fucks-given, long bleach blonde hair....

But. I believe I can resemble that person again. I can look like her.... but a few years older. No problem. 

I GOT THIS.